The_Real_Slim_Shady_-_Eminem_[Lyrics](256k)
[00:01.64] May I have your attention, please?
[00:05.35] May I have your attention, please?
[00:08.62] Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
[00:11.37] I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
[00:16.34] We're gonna have a problem here
[00:17.59] Ya'll act like you never seen a white person before
[00:20.08] Jaws all on the floor like Pam, like Tommy just burst in the door
[00:22.88] And started whoopin' her ass worse than before
[00:24.59] They first were divorced, throwin' her over furniture (Ahh)
[00:26.83] It's the return of the, oh wait, no way, you're kidding
[00:29.88] He didn't just say what I think he did, did he
[00:32.11] And Dr. Dre said, nothing you idiots
[00:34.36] Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement (Haha)
[00:36.36] Feminist women love Eminem
[00:38.12] Chicka-chicka-chicka Slim Shady, I'm sick of him
[00:40.35] Look at him, walkin' around, grabbin' his you-know-what
[00:42.88] Flippin' the you-know-who, yeah but he's so cute though
[00:45.12] Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
[00:47.61] But no worse, than what's goin' on in your parents bedrooms
[00:49.86] Sometimes I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't
[00:52.61] But it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
[00:54.61] My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips
[00:56.84] And if I'm lucky you might just give it a little kiss
[00:59.11] And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
[01:01.34] And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
[01:03.84] Of course they're gonna know what intercourse is
[01:05.68] By the time they hit fourth grade
[01:06.86] They got the Discovery Channel don't they
[01:08.60] We ain't nothin' but mammals
[01:10.13] Well, some of us are cannibals
[01:11.32] Who cut other people open like cantaloupes
[01:13.37] But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
[01:15.37] Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
[01:17.61] But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
[01:19.89] Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes
[01:22.36] I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
[01:24.35] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating
[01:26.64] So won't the real Slim Shady, please stand up
[01:29.10] Please stand up, please stand up
[01:31.11] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
[01:33.37] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating
[01:35.84] So won't the real Slim Shady, please stand up
[01:38.09] Please stand up, please stand up
[01:40.36] Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records
[01:42.85] Well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too
[01:45.08] You think I give a damn about a Grammy
[01:46.86] Half of you critics can't even stomach me
[01:48.58] Let alone stand me
[01:49.83] But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird
[01:51.87] Why, so you guys can just lie to get me here
[01:54.12] So you can sit me here next to Britney Spears
[01:56.32] Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
[01:58.62] So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
[02:01.11] And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first
[02:03.11] Little bitch put me on blast on MTV
[02:05.61] Yeah he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hehe
[02:07.85] I should download her audio on mp3
[02:10.35] And show the whole world, how you gave Eminem VD (Ahh)
[02:12.35] I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me
[02:15.59] So I have been sent here to destroy you
[02:17.34] And there's a million of us just like me
[02:19.60] Who cuss like me, who just don't give a fuck like me
[02:21.61] Who dress like me, walk talk and act like me
[02:23.85] And just might be, the next best thing, but not quite me
[02:26.39] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
[02:28.61] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating
[02:30.84] So won't the real Slim Shady, please stand up
[02:33.40] Please stand up, please stand up
[02:35.61] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
[02:37.84] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating
[02:40.15] So won't the real Slim Shady, please stand up
[02:42.36] Please stand up, please stand up
[02:44.62] I'm like a head trip to listen to, 'cause I'm only givin' you
[02:47.36] Things you joke about with your friends inside your livin' room
[02:49.36] The only difference is I got the balls to say it in front of ya'll
[02:52.14] And I don't gotta be false or sugar-coat it at all
[02:54.36] I just get on the mic and spit it
[02:56.36] And whether you like to admit it, I just shit it
[02:58.37] Better than ninety percent of you rappers out can
[03:00.60] Then you wonder, how can kids eat up these albums like Valiums?
[03:03.35] It's funny 'cause at the rate I'm goin' when I'm thirty
[03:05.61] I'll be the only person in the nursin' home flirting
[03:07.84] Pinchin' nurses asses while I'm jackin' off with Jergens
[03:09.87] And I'm jerkin' but this whole bag of Viagra isn't workin'
[03:12.36] In every single person there's a Slim Shady lurkin'
[03:14.59] He could be workin' at Burger King, spittin' on your onion rings
[03:17.33] Or in the parkin' lot circling, screamin' I don't give a fuck
[03:20.11] With his windows down and his system up
[03:21.83] So will the real Shady, please stand up
[03:23.87] And put one of those fingers, on each hand up
[03:26.09] And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
[03:28.62] And one more time loud as you can how does it go
[03:30.86] I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
[03:32.86] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating
[03:35.11] So won't the real Slim Shady, please stand up
[03:37.85] Please stand up, please stand up
[03:39.86] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
[03:42.11] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating
[03:44.39] So won't the real Slim Shady, please stand up
[03:46.86] Please stand up, please stand up
[03:49.12] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
[03:51.39] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating
[03:53.62] So won't the real Slim Shady, please stand up
[03:57.62] Please stand up, please stand up
[03:58.34] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
[04:00.62] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating
[04:02.83] So won't the real Slim Shady, please stand up
[04:05.07] Please stand up, please stand up
[04:07.88] Haha, guess there's a Slim Shady in all of us
[04:12.87] Fuck it, let's all stand up
