14 Insane Clown Posse - Mad Professor

[00:00.43] *Laughs* "Oh, shit. He's here. Hi."

[00:11.59] "Uh, how ya doin', uh, this the right place for that furniture? Uh."

[00:15.04] "Yeah, it sure is. Come on in."

[00:16.64] "Pretty nice place here you got, um, the cobwebs are a nice touch. Uh, so that's the couch, ay?"

[00:22.48] "Yeah, we got some, um, take a look at that upholstery right there."

[00:25.92] "It's pretty fuckin' nice."

[00:26.72] "That's real-" *noise*

[00:27.54] "Oh, you doing alright there?"

[00:29.12] "Excuse me. Real upholstery"

[00:29.92] "I ain't seen nothin' like that since, uh, shit, back in the-"

[00:32.57] *Hit* "Motherfucker! You want my couch? You motherfucker! I need your motherfuckin' brain! You can't have my couch! The fuck you thinkin'? Now come here you big, fat motherfucker! Get on the table!"

[00:54.35] I was never popular, this I'll admit, fuck school

[00:57.55] School never liked me, cool!

[00:59.66] All the kids would always beat me until I'm half-dead

[01:02.32] Make fun of the size of my forehead

[01:04.72] But that shit never bothered me

[01:07.10] Mama and Mother, they owned a lot of property (Yeah)

[01:09.49] They had a science lab in the basement

[01:11.89] And that's where my free ti- well, all my time was spent

[01:14.54] I made a mouse with a chicken head

[01:16.67] It clucked three times, cluck, cluck, cluck, and then it was dead

[01:19.58] I made a lot of things though, like a frog with a turkey neck

[01:22.78] Gobblegobblegobble, it was the shit (Yeah)

[01:24.63] But I'm still lonely, I need a homie

[01:27.02] So I collected limbs and made me a zombie

[01:29.68] I could've made a girlie friend, but fuck that

[01:31.54] I got my girlie right here *Masturbation noises* yeah

[01:36.87] [(Under the direction of-)] You can call me Mad Professor

[01:40.05] [(Strange as it may seem)] I will make a friend for me

[01:44.82] [(Under the direction of-)] You can call me Mad Professor

[01:49.86] [(Strange as it may seem)] We will rule eternity

[01:54.65] "So this is, like, where you live?"

[01:58.63] "That's right. Why? You don't like it?"

[02:00.23] "I mean, oh my God. It's dirty. Do you like-"

[02:04.48] *Hit* *Laughs* "Shut up, bitch! Gimme your tippy toes."

[02:08.99] I used so many body parts it was crazy

[02:11.92] I killed a whole bunch of motherfuckers, like (What?) eighty

[02:14.58] They all chipped in on my special friend

[02:16.69] Everything helps, Even if you got a finger to lend, come on

[02:19.62] I hear the other children playing outside

[02:21.74] "Keep it down, you little bitches, I'll skin your fuckin' hides!"

[02:24.39] Stressful, (Uh) this part's wack (What?)

[02:26.79] Some how I gotta attach this nut sack

[02:29.45] Shit! Fuck! I'm sawin' off an elbow

[02:31.84] Looking at the meter on my Quasar Ziptalo (What?)

[02:34.50] Or better yet look out the fucking window

[02:37.15] I see a storm's comin', almost time to roll

[02:39.54] Screw the head on, come on, come on

[02:42.20] It's the thuggish, ruggish, bone

[02:44.32] Okay it's time, hit the switch, turn it up a hert

[02:46.97] Fuck! (Shit!) Didn't work

[02:49.63] [(Under the direction of-)] You can call me Mad Professor

[02:55.21] [(Strange as it may seem)] I will make a friend for me

[03:00.26] [(Under the direction of-)] You can call me Mad Professor

[03:05.32] [(Strange as it may seem)] We will rule eternity

[03:10.37] "I am your creature, with which [?] the horror [?]. Is it me, or is it the man that made me, [?] evil [?] time. [?] the awful thing that lies waiting to kill you."

[03:28.96] "Hey"

[03:31.61] "Hey, you called for a wrecker?"

[03:32.95] "Sure did. Come on in."

[03:34.28] "Uh, I got the truck waited outside. I'ma go ahead and-"

[03:36.66] *Hit* "Ow, motherfucker! You- what'd you hit me with, a fryin' pan or somethin'? The fuck, bro?"

[03:40.65] *Hit* "You crazy motherfucker. Ow, that still hurts."

[03:43.84] *Hit* "Come here!"

[03:45.96] "Man, I'ma fuck you up, oh"

[03:47.29] "Get back here!"

[03:48.36] "Hey! He's trying to kill me! Uh!"

[03:49.41] *Hit* "[?]"

[03:50.74] It wasn't always easy, (Hell no) let me tell ya

[03:51.80] But fuck that, c'ause I ain't no failure

[03:54.47] I put the shit with the veins and the stuff with that

[03:56.86] Wait a minute *fart* did you hear that? (Yeah!)

[03:59.24] It's alive! (Woo hoo) I just gotta wake it up

[04:01.90] Hand me that Rock 'n Rye! (Come on) Pour it in the cup

[04:04.29] Give it to his ass, wait, hold up, pause

[04:06.94] I ain't cleaning his drawers, man, fuck that

[04:09.61] Get him fat, get him ready, it's almost time

[04:12.27] Paint his ugly face up almost like mine

[04:14.65] I see him twitching, I'm on a roll

[04:17.04] He can help me tell the whole world about the carnival

[04:19.70] Turn the hertz all the way up for this shit

[04:22.09] And just wait for that lightning bolt to hit (Come on, come on)

[04:24.75] Did it work? You make the call

[04:27.40] Shaggy? What up, y'all?

[04:29.79] You can call me Mad Professor (Yeah! I'm in this bitch!)

[04:35.91] I will make a friend for me (Ha ha ha ha!)

[04:42.01] You can call me Mad Professor (What? I live!)

[04:45.46] [(Strange as it may seem)] (I'm alive!)

[04:46.81] We will rule eternity (I'm alive!)

[04:51.84] You can call me Mad Professor

[04:57.15] I will make a friend for me

[05:02.19] You can call me Mad Professor

[05:06.98] We will rule eternity

[05:12.82] [(Under the direction of-)] You can call me Mad Professor

[05:14.68] [(Strange as it may seem)] I will make a friend for me

[05:20.52] [(Under the direction of-)] You can call me Mad Professor

[05:25.03] [(Strange as it may seem)] We will rule eternity

[05:31.95] We will rule eternity

[05:37.00] We will rule eternity

[05:42.04] We will rule eternity

[05:47.09] We will rule eternity