The Diagnosis Fan Musical
[00:00.76] Cheeks are sunken
[00:02.35] Like an old man's as he dies (What?)
[00:04.76] And from the bulging of your eyes
[00:07.66] You got the most severe of cases
[00:10.32] (That's just how my face is!)
[00:11.93] Posture's shrunken
[00:13.52] Nausea is your new routine
[00:16.18] It's up to us to intervene
[00:19.10] And shed a light on what your symptoms mean
[00:22.00] All the indicators tell us
[00:23.88] You're jealous (Huh?)
[00:25.74] It's safe to say Alhaitham's great renown
[00:29.18] In Teyvat brings you down
[00:33.96] They tell us
[00:35.57] You're jealous
[00:36.88] You're diagnosed
[00:38.23] Let's toast to nature's law
[00:40.88] Your symptoms have a cause
[00:46.18] "This is crazy!"
[00:47.26] "What makes you think I'm jealous of Alhaitham?"
[00:50.96] It's his look
[00:51.75] It's his vibe
[00:52.56] It's his status as a scribe
[00:53.88] Bet you nag him like a spouse
[00:55.22] Because you can't afford his house (Hey!)
[00:56.81] It's the "clap, clap, clap" he got as Acting Grand Sage
[00:59.74] Do you "snap, snap, snap" because his youth remind you of your age?
[01:02.68] Turn the page!
[01:03.73] It could be the fact that you want his wage
[01:05.07] Since you're always short of Mora
[01:06.39] (You know, debt like I know flora)
[01:07.97] For a second just reflect
[01:09.58] And respect our intellect
[01:10.63] Our theory isn't off-the-cuff it's obvious
[01:12.48] "I'VE HAD ENOUGH"
[01:15.68] Fellas, he's jealous (C'mon)
[01:18.33] No wonder why if I was broke as you
[01:22.58] I'd feel pathetic too
[01:25.51] As clues accrue
[01:26.85] They tell us
[01:28.18] You're jealous
[01:29.48] You're diagnosed!
[01:30.83] Let's toast to nature's law
[01:33.75] Your symptoms have a cause
[01:37.46] You've been in denial a while
[01:42.24] But it'd be best if you confess the way you really feel
[01:49.41] You'd share it
[01:50.49] We'd hear it
[01:52.07] Your spirit would soar
[01:55.27] There's no need to conceal
[01:57.92] What could help you to heal
[02:04.29] So tell us, you're jealous
[02:10.39] We're zealous
[02:12.27] 'Cause we've been there before
[02:14.92] You'd share it
[02:15.71] We'd hear it
[02:16.78] Your spirit would soar
[02:19.17] (Tell us, you're jealous)
[02:21.03] The truth is a useful tool
[02:23.14] (Tell us, you're jealous)
[02:25.00] Let's move on, so we can duel
[02:27.14] (Tell us, you're jealous)
[02:28.72] You don't have to play pretend
[02:30.85] (Tell us, you're jealous)
[02:32.71] Or this song will never end!
[02:36.95] I'm jealous!
