Arose

[00:06.63] If I could rewind time like a tape

[00:09.07] Inside a boombox, one day for every pill or Percocet that I ate

[00:12.38] Cut down on the Valium, I'da heard everything

[00:18.15] But death is turning, so definite, wait!

[00:21.13] They got me all hooked up to some machine

[00:23.32] I love you, Bean, didn't want you to know I was struggling

[00:26.84] Feels like I'm underwater submerged like a submarine

[00:30.11] Just heard that nurse say, my liver and kidneys aren't functioning

[00:33.85] Been flirtatious with death, skirt-chasing, I guess

[00:34.64] It's arrivederci, same nurse, just heard say they're unplugging me

[00:36.13] And it's your birthday, Jade, I'm missing your birthday

[00:39.89] Baby girl, I'm sorry, I fucking hate when you hurt, Hai

[00:46.62] And sweeties, thank you for waiting to open gifts

[00:49.63] But, girls, you can just open 'em

[00:50.83] Dad ain't making it home for Christmas

[00:53.34] Wish I had the strength to just blow a kiss

[00:55.62] I go to make a fist, but I can't make one, I'm frozen stiff

[00:58.65] I yell, but nothing comes out, I'm crying inside, I shout

[01:01.89] My vocal cords won't permit me, I scream, but it's not aloud

[01:06.12] You put your arm around Mama to calm her, wow

[01:08.61] I just thought about the aisle I'll never get to walk us down

[01:12.14] Never see you graduate in your caps and gowns

[01:14.61] It's 'bout to be 2008, how's this happening now?

[01:18.82] I got so much more to do

[01:20.33] And, Proof, I'm truly sorry if I let you down, but this tore me in two

[01:25.07] The thought of no more me and you

[01:27.58] You gave me shoes, Nikes like new for me for school

[01:31.44] Doody, I'm trying, but you, you were the glue that binded

[01:34.62] So many things, time, I'd give anything to rewind it

[01:37.64] I had to walk down my halls and constantly be reminded

[01:41.08] By pictures all on my walls and I couldn't sleep at night 'cause

[01:44.58] That image burned in my brain of you on that table

[01:47.13] Me falling across your body, not able to stand to save you

[01:50.37] God, why did you take him?

[01:52.63] I'm tryna keep his legacy alive, but I'm dying, where's Nathan?

[01:57.34] Little ladies, be brave, take care of your mother

[01:58.07] Smile pretty for pictures, always cherish each other

[02:06.33] I'll always love ya, and I'll be in the back of your memory

[02:06.65] And I know you'll never forget me

[02:08.37] Just don't get sad when remembering

[02:09.58] And, little bro, keep making me proud

[02:11.57] You better marry that girl 'cause she's faithfully down

[02:15.36] And when you're exchanging those sacred vows

[02:17.61] Just know that if I could be there, I would

[02:19.14] And should you ever see parenthood, I know you'll be good at it

[02:22.14] Oh, almost forgot to do something, thank my father too

[02:26.13] I actually learned a lot from you

[02:28.08] You taught me what not to do

[02:30.33] And, Mom, wish I'd have had the chance

[02:32.13] To have one last heart-to-heart honest and open talk with you

[02:35.62] Doody, I see you, I go to walk to you

[02:38.32] And I can feel my soul leave my body and float across the room

[02:41.87] Nurses lean over the bed, pulling tubes out

[02:45.58] Then the sheet over my head, shut the room down

[02:48.36] Girls, please don't get upset, I see them cheeks soaking and wet

[02:50.58] As you squeeze hold of my neck, so forcibly, don't wanna let

[02:55.58] Me go, pillow drenched, emotional wrecks

[02:56.60] With every second, each closer to death

[03:01.57] But suddenly I feel my heart begin to beat slow then a breath, machines go

[03:09.39] Must've guessed the cheat codes to this shit

[03:10.09] I'm trying to rewind time like a tape

[03:11.67] Find an escape, make a beeline, try and awake

[03:14.87] From this dream, I need to re-find my inner strength

[03:18.10] To remind me, even if a steep climb I must take

[03:20.90] To rewrite a mistake, I'm rewinding the tape

[03:27.39] I'll put out this last album, then I'm done with it

[03:30.62] One hundred percent finished, fed up with it

[03:34.40] I'm hanging it up, fuck it!

[03:35.61] Excuse the cursing, baby, but just know

[03:36.39] That I'm a good person, though they portray me as cold

[03:39.36] And if things should worsen, but I bet you they won't

[03:41.87] I'm pledging to throw this methadone in the toilet

[03:44.64] Shred these old letters I wrote

[03:46.09] All that old pathetic loathing, closing credits can roll

[03:48.11] I'm proud to be back

[03:50.82] I'm 'bout to, like a rematch, outdo Relapse

[03:53.64] With Recovery, Mathers LP2

[03:56.62] Help propel me to victory laps

[03:59.13] Gas toward 'em and fast forward the past

[04:01.65] Consider the last four minutes as

[04:02.83] The song I'da sang to my daughters

[04:05.14] If I'da made it to the hospital less than 2 hours later, but I fought it

[04:07.58] And came back like a boomerang on 'em

[04:10.58] Now a new day is dawnin'

[04:12.12] I'm up, Tuesday, it's mornin', now I know