Eminem_-_The_Real_Slim_Shady
[00:00.93] "The Real Slim Shady"
[00:03.05] May I have your attention please?
[00:05.81] May I have your attention please?
[00:08.56] Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
[00:11.75] I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
[00:16.53] We're gonna have a problem here
[00:17.86] Y'all act like you never seen a white person before
[00:19.98] Jaws all on the floor like Pam and Tommy just burst in the door
[00:22.64] And started whooping her ass worse than before
[00:24.50] They first were divorced, throwing her over furniture (Ah!)
[00:26.89] It's the return of the... "Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding
[00:29.54] He didn't just say what I think he did, did he?"
[00:32.20] And Dr. Dre said... nothing, you idiots!
[00:34.33] Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement! (Ha-ha!)
[00:36.45] Feminist women love Eminem
[00:38.66] Chigga chigga chigga
[00:39.58] "Slim Shady, I'm sick of him
[00:40.49] Look at him, walking around grabbing his you-know-what
[00:42.87] Flipping the you-know-who." "Yeah, but he's so cute though!"
[00:45.26] Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
[00:47.65] But no worse, than what's going on in your parents' bedrooms
[00:50.31] Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't
[00:53.34] But it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
[00:54.78] "My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips"
[00:56.91] And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
[00:59.30] And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
[01:01.42] And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
[01:03.81] Of course they gonna know what intercourse is
[01:05.67] By the time they hit fourth grade
[01:07.00] They got the Discovery Channel, don't they?
[01:08.86] "We ain't nothing but mammals.." Well, some of us cannibals
[01:11.25] Who cut other people open like cantaloupes [*slurp*]
[01:14.12] But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
[01:15.69] Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
[01:18.01] [*ewww!*] But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
[01:19.99] Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes
[01:22.38] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[01:24.51] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[01:26.63] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[01:29.29] Please stand up, please stand up?
[01:31.41] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[01:33.54] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[01:35.93] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[01:38.32] Please stand up, please stand up?
[01:40.44] Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records
[01:43.37] Well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too!
[01:45.34] You think I give a damn about a Grammy?
[01:46.93] Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me
[01:49.86] "But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?"
[01:51.98] Why? So you guys could just lie to get me here?
[01:54.10] So you can, sit me here next to Britney Spears?
[01:56.50] Yo Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
[01:58.89] So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
[02:01.28] And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first
[02:03.67] Little bitch, put me on blast on MTV
[02:05.79] "Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee!"
[02:08.18] I should download her audio on MP3
[02:10.31] And show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD
[02:13.35] I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me
[02:15.57] So I have been sent here to destroy you
[02:17.70] And there's a million of us just like me
[02:19.56] Who cuss like me; who just don't give a fuck like me
[02:21.69] Who dress like me; walk, talk and act like me
[02:24.07] It just might be the next best thing but not quite me!
[02:26.73] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[02:28.59] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[02:30.98] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[02:33.37] Please stand up, please stand up?
[02:35.50] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[02:37.89] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[02:40.28] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[02:42.67] Please stand up, please stand up?
[02:44.80] I'm like a head trip to listen to, cause I'm only giving you
[02:47.45] Things you joke about with your friends inside your living room
[02:49.69] The only difference is I got the balls to say it
[02:51.82] In front of y'all and I don't gotta be false or sugarcoated at all
[02:54.95] I just get on the mic and spit it
[02:56.38] And whether you like to admit it [*err*] I just shit it
[02:58.51] Better than ninety percent of you rappers out can
[03:00.64] Then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like Valiums
[03:03.51] It's funny; 'cause at the rate I'm going when I'm thirty
[03:05.47] I'll be the only person in the nursing home flirting
[03:08.40] Pinching nurses asses when I'm jacking off with Jergens
[03:10.36] And I'm jerking but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working
[03:12.75] And every single person is a Slim Shady lurking
[03:14.61] He could be working at Burger King, spitting on your onion rings
[03:17.26] [*hach*] Or in the parking lot, circling
[03:19.49] Screaming "I don't give a fuck!"
[03:20.40] With his windows down and his system up
[03:22.47] So, will the real Shady please stand up?
[03:23.90] And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
[03:26.29] And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
[03:28.69] And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?
[03:31.18] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[03:32.87] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[03:35.26] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[03:37.76] Please stand up, please stand up?
[03:40.21] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[03:42.16] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[03:44.55] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[03:46.95] Please stand up, please stand up?
[03:49.33] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[03:51.46] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[03:53.85] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[03:56.24] Please stand up, please stand up?
[03:58.36] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[04:00.49] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[04:02.99] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[04:05.37] Please stand up, please stand up?
[04:08.83] Ha ha
[04:09.99] Guess there's a Slim Shady in all of us
[04:13.45] Fuck it, let's all stand up
