Touch-Tone Telephone

[00:34.60] I think it's time for you to know the awful truth

[00:43.64] Mm, the truth about me, and the truth about you

[00:47.09] 'Cause you're a brand-new species

[00:49.23] Big cat (oh-oh), space Nazis, Robert Stack (oh, oh)

[00:54.02] God-damn it, gonna snap, Leonard Nimoy (oh, oh-oh-oh-oh)

[00:58.26] Call me back (call me back)

[00:59.59] I try to call you every day

[01:01.18] I'm rehearsing what to say when the truth comes out (of my very own mouth)

[01:05.96] I've been working on a unified theory

[01:08.62] If I make it through tonight, everybody's gonna hear me out

[01:11.80] 'Cause I'm the right one

[01:15.00] On my touch-tone, touch-tone telephone

[01:18.19] I'm the only one

[01:21.10] On your AM, AM radio

[01:23.76] Oh, I'm crying now, authentic tears

[01:32.26] They flow out of me when I think about you

[01:34.92] 'Cause you're the only person in the world who'd understand

[01:38.11] 'Cause you're the only person in the world who'd understand the meaning of this

[01:41.84] Oh my god

[01:43.97] I try, and I try, and I try to make you listen to me

[01:47.68] I try to call you every day

[01:49.28] I'm rehearsing what to say when the truth comes out (of my very own mouth)

[01:54.05] I've been working on a unified theory

[01:56.72] If I make it through tonight, everybody's gonna hear me out

[01:59.63] 'Cause I'm the right one

[02:03.09] On my touch-tone, touch-tone telephone

[02:06.01] I'm the only one (hey)

[02:09.20] On your AM, AM radio

[02:11.59] ♪

[02:35.76] Don't hang up yet, I'm not done

[02:38.68] I'm an expert, I'm the one

[02:42.14] The one who was right all along

[02:44.79] Better to be laughed at than wrong

[02:47.72] I'm an expert in my field

[02:50.90] UFOlogy, yes, it's all real

[02:53.83] Ancient aliens, it's all true

[02:57.01] I'm an expert just like you

[02:58.87] And like you, I'm a genius before my time

[03:02.61] Disbelieving, that's the real crime

[03:05.79] Pretty soon, they'll discover me

[03:08.71] In the Super-Sargasso Sea

[03:11.64] I try to call you every day

[03:13.76] What can I say when the truth comes out? (Of my very own mouth)

[03:18.01] I've been working on a unified theory

[03:20.40] If I make it through tonight, everybody's gonna hear me out (now)

[03:23.72] 'Cause I'm the right one (now) on my touch-tone telephone (now)

[03:27.17] On my touch-tone, touch-tone telephone

[03:29.83] I'm the only one on your AM radio

[03:33.02] (On your AM, AM radio)