Welcome to the Internet
[00:00.06] Welcome to the internet
[00:01.98] Have a look around
[00:03.60] Anything that brain of yours can think of can be found
[00:07.07] We've got mountains of content
[00:09.19] Some better, some worse
[00:11.37] If none of it's of interest to you, you'd be the first
[00:15.10] Welcome to the internet
[00:17.23] Come and take a seat
[00:18.57] Would you like to see the news or any famous women's feet?
[00:22.56] There's no need to panic
[00:24.72] This isn't a test, haha
[00:26.86] Just nod or shake your head and we'll do the rest
[00:30.61] Welcome to the internet
[00:32.49] What would you prefer?
[00:33.83] Would you like to fight for civil rights or tweet a racial slur?
[00:38.11] Be happy
[00:38.92] Be horny
[00:40.01] Be bursting with rage
[00:42.15] We got a million different ways to engage
[00:46.16] Welcome to the internet
[00:48.00] Put your cares aside
[00:49.34] Here's a tip for straining pasta
[00:51.22] Here's a nine-year-old who died
[00:53.08] We got movies, and doctors, and fantasy sports
[00:56.80] And a bunch of colored pencil drawings
[00:58.68] Of all the different characters in Harry Potter fucking each other
[01:00.83] Welcome to the internet
[01:02.19] Hold on to your socks
[01:03.56] 'Cause a random guy just kindly sent you photos of his cock
[01:06.74] They are grainy and off-putting
[01:08.61] He just sent you more
[01:10.49] Don't act surprised, you know you like it, you whore
[01:13.17] See a man beheaded
[01:14.54] Get offended, see a shrink
[01:15.87] Show us pictures of your children
[01:17.22] Tell us every thought you think
[01:18.82] Start a rumor, buy a broom
[01:20.20] Or send a death threat to a boomer
[01:21.61] Or DM a girl and groom her
[01:22.72] Do a Zoom or find a tumor in your
[01:24.04] Here's a healthy breakfast option
[01:26.18] You should kill your mom
[01:27.50] Here's why women never fuck you
[01:28.82] Here's how you can build a bomb
[01:30.96] Which Power Ranger are you?
[01:32.01] Take this quirky quiz
[01:33.38] Obama sent the immigrants to vaccinate your kids
[01:37.65] Could I interest you in everything?
[01:39.24] All of the time?
[01:40.84] A little bit of everything
[01:42.45] All of the time
[01:43.78] Apathy's a tragedy
[01:45.37] And boredom is a crime
[01:46.71] Anything and everything
[01:48.30] All of the time
[01:49.10] Could I interest you in everything?
[01:50.96] All of the time?
[01:52.56] A little bit of everything
[01:53.90] All of the time
[01:55.24] Apathy's a tragedy
[01:56.31] And boredom is a crime
[01:58.44] Anything and everything
[01:59.78] All of the time
[02:10.45] You know, it wasn't always like this
[02:18.17] Not very long ago
[02:21.91] Just before your time
[02:25.90] Right before the towers fell, circa '99
[02:32.83] This was catalogs
[02:35.21] Travel blogs
[02:37.61] A chat room or two
[02:40.81] We set our sights and spent our nights
[02:44.81] Waiting
[02:47.74] For you, you, insatiable you
[02:55.46] Mommy let you use her iPad
[02:59.72] You were barely two
[03:03.18] And it did all the things
[03:06.10] We designed it to do
[03:11.14] Now look at you, oh
[03:15.41] Look at you, you, you
[03:21.81] Unstoppable, watchable
[03:26.40] Your time is now
[03:27.74] Your inside's out
[03:29.88] Honey, how you grew
[03:33.34] And if we stick together
[03:37.08] Who knows what we'll do
[03:41.07] It was always the plan
[03:44.59] To put the world in your hand
[03:49.12] Hahaha
[04:00.33] Could I interest you in everything?
[04:03.53] All of the time
[04:06.19] A bit of everything
[04:08.86] All of the time
[04:11.26] Apathy's a tragedy
[04:13.66] And boredom is a crime
[04:16.31] Anything and everything
[04:18.71] All of the time
[04:20.04] Could I interest you in everything?
[04:21.65] All of the time
[04:23.01] A little bit of everything
[04:24.60] All of the time
[04:25.95] Apathy's a tragedy
[04:27.00] And boredom is a crime
[04:28.59] Anything and everything
[04:30.20] And anything and everything
[04:31.26] And anything and everything
[04:32.89] And all of the time
