Slim shady
[00:02.65] May I have your attention, please?
[00:07.17] May I have your attention, please?
[00:09.83] Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
[00:13.55] I repeat: Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
[00:18.85] We’re gonna have a problem here
[00:20.97] Y’all act like you’ve never seen a white person before
[00:23.37] Jaws all on the floor like Pam, like Tommy just burst in the door
[00:26.56] And started whoopin’ her ass worse than before
[00:28.70] They first were divorced, throwin’ her over furniture (ahh!)
[00:31.36] It’s the return of the… "Ah, wait, no way, you’re kidding
[00:34.81] He didn’t just say what I think he did, did he?"
[00:37.47] And Dr. Dre said… nothing, you idiots
[00:40.38] Dr. Dre’s dead, he’s locked in my basement (ha, ha!)
[00:41.96] Feminist women love Eminem
[00:44.37] "Chicka, chicka, chicka, Slim Shady, I’m sick of him
[00:47.33] Look at him walking around grabbing his you-know-what
[00:49.73] Flipping the you-know-who." "Yeah, but he’s so cute though"
[00:52.63] Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
[00:55.82] But no worse than what’s goin’ on in your parents’ bedrooms (Uhh-uhh-uhh!)
[00:58.23] Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose but can’t
[01:00.88] But it’s cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
[01:03.54] "My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips"
[01:06.73] And if I’m lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
[01:09.11] And that’s the message that we deliver to little kids
[01:11.77] And expect them not to know what a woman’s clitoris is
[01:14.16] Of course they’re gonna know what intercourse is by the time they hit fourth grade
[01:17.87] They got the Discovery Channel, don’t they?
[01:19.48] We ain’t nothing but mammals… well, some of us, cannibals
[01:22.99] Who cut other people open like cantaloupes
[01:25.11] But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
[01:27.77] Then there’s no reason that a man and another man can’t elope (eugh!)
[01:30.41] But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
[01:33.08] Women wave your pantyhose; sing the chorus, and it goes
[01:35.46] I’m Slim Shady, yes I’m the real Shady
[01:38.38] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[01:41.05] So won’t the real Slim Shady please stand up
[01:43.96] Please stand up, please stand up?
[01:45.84] ’Cause Slim Shady, yes I’m the real Shady
[01:48.76] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[01:52.21] So won’t the real Slim Shady please stand up
[01:54.07] Please stand up, please stand up?
[01:56.46] Will Smith don’t gotta cuss in his raps to sell records
[01:59.11] Well I do, so fuck him and fuck you, too
[02:02.04] You think I give a damn about a Grammy?
[02:04.16] Half o’ you critics can’t even stomach me, let alone stand me
[02:09.77] "But Slim, what if you win, wouldn’t it be weird?"
[02:10.84] Why, so you guys can just lie to get me here?
[02:14.82] So you can sit me here next to Britney Spears?
[02:15.34] Yo shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
[02:18.27] So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
[02:21.19] And hear ’em argue over who she gave head to first
[02:23.06] Little bitch put me on blast on MTV
[02:25.43] "Yeah he’s cute, but I think he’s married to Kim, hehe"
[02:28.36] I should download her audio on MP3
[02:31.04] And show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD (ahh!)
[02:34.23] I’m sick of you little girl and boy groups; all you do is annoy me
[02:37.16] So I have been sent here to destroy you
[02:39.30] And there’s a million of us just like me
[02:41.97] Who cuss like me, who just don’t give a fuck like me
[02:44.60] Who dress like me, walk, talk, and act like me
[02:47.53] And just might be the next best thing but not quite me
[02:50.19] ’Cause I’m Slim Shady, yes I’m the real Shady
[02:52.58] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[02:56.85] So won’t the real Slim Shady please stand up
[02:58.19] Please stand up, please stand up?
[03:00.58] ’Cause I’m Slim Shady, yes I’m the real Shady
[03:03.23] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[03:05.90] So won’t the real Slim Shady please stand up
[03:07.49] Please stand up, please stand up?
[03:11.50] I’m like a head trip to listen to, ’cause I’m only giving you
[03:14.41] Things you joke about with your friends, inside your livin’ room
[03:17.34] The only difference is I got the balls to say it in front of y’all
[03:19.45] And I don’t gotta be false or sugar-coat it all
[03:22.39] I just get on the mic and spit it
[03:27.44] And whether you like to admit it (rip), I just shit it
[03:28.22] Better than ninety percent of you rappers out can
[03:29.55] Then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like Valiums
[03:32.73] It’s funny, ’cause at the rate I’m going, when I’m thirty
[03:35.16] I’ll be the only person in the nursin’ home flirting
[03:38.09] Pinchin’ nurses asses, while I’m jackin’ off with Jergens
[03:40.78] And I’m jerkin’, but this whole bag of Viagra isn’t workin’
[03:43.45] In every single person there’s a Slim Shady lurkin’
[03:46.11] Who could be workin’ at Burger King, spittin’ on your onion rings
[03:49.02] Or in the parking lot circling, screamin’ "I don’t give a fuck"
[03:51.96] With his windows down and his system up
[03:54.37] So will the real Shady please stand up
[03:57.03] And put one of those fingers on each hand up
[03:59.67] And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
[04:02.38] And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?
[04:05.02] ’Cause I’m Slim Shady, yes I’m the real Shady
[04:07.42] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[04:10.07] So won’t the real Slim Shady please stand up
[04:12.19] Please stand up, please stand up?
[04:15.15] ’Cause I’m Slim Shady, yes I’m the real Shady
[04:17.53] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[04:20.46] So won’t the real Slim Shady please stand up
[04:23.42] Please stand up, please stand up?
[04:26.06] ’Cause I’m Slim Shady, yes I’m the real Shady
[04:29.08] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[04:30.92] So won’t the real Slim Shady please stand up
[04:33.88] Please stand up, please stand up?
[04:36.26] I’m Slim Shady, yes I’m the real Shady
[04:38.67] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[04:41.05] So won’t the real Slim Shady please stand up
[04:45.31] Please stand up, please stand up?
[04:46.93] Haha, guess there’s a Slim Shady in all of us
[04:51.75] Fuck it, let’s all stand up
