Eminem_-_The_Real_Slim_Shady_47829433
[00:02.42] May I have your attention, please?
[00:05.87] May I have your attention, please?
[00:08.79] Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
[00:11.98] I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
[00:16.76] We're gonna have a problem here...
[00:18.09] Y'all act like you never seen a white person before
[00:19.95] Jaws all on the floor like Pam like Tommy just burst in the door
[00:22.60] And started whoopin' her ass worse than before
[00:24.73] They first were divorced, suin' her over furniture (Agh!)
[00:26.85] It's the return of the "Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding
[00:29.51] He didn't just say what I think he did, did he?"
[00:31.63] And Dr. Dre said… nothing, you idiots!
[00:34.82] Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement (Ha ha!)
[00:36.68] Feminist women love Eminem
[00:38.27] "Chicka, chicka, chicka, Slim Shady, I'm sick of him
[00:40.66] Look at him, walkin' around, grabbin' his you-know-what
[00:43.59] Flippin' the you-know-who," "Yeah, but he's so cute though."
[00:45.45] Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
[00:47.84] But no worse than what's goin' on in your parents' bedrooms
[00:49.96] Sometimes I wanna get on TV and just let loose
[00:52.88] But can't, but it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
[00:54.74] "My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips"
[00:57.13] And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
[00:58.99] And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
[01:01.38] And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
[01:03.77] Of course, they're gonna know what intercourse is
[01:05.63] By the time they hit fourth grade
[01:07.23] They've got the Discovery Channel, don't they?
[01:08.56] We ain't nothin' but mammals—well, some of us, cannibals
[01:11.48] Who cut other people open like cantaloupes
[01:13.07] But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
[01:15.46] Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
[01:17.85] But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
[01:19.71] Women, wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus, and it goes—
[01:22.63] I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[01:24.49] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[01:26.88] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[01:28.48] Please stand up, please stand up?
[01:31.67] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[01:33.79] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[01:35.92] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[01:37.24] Please stand up, please stand up?
[01:40.70] Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records (Nope)
[01:43.09] Well, I do, so fuck him and fuck you too!
[01:45.21] You think I give a damn about a Grammy?
[01:47.07] Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me
[01:49.73] "But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?"
[01:52.12] Why, so you guys could just lie to get me here?
[01:54.24] So you can sit me here next to Britney Spears?
[01:56.10] Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
[01:58.76] So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
[02:01.15] And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first
[02:03.81] Little bitch put me on blast on MTV
[02:05.93] "Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee."
[02:08.32] I should download her audio on MP3
[02:10.45] And show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD (Agh!)
[02:12.84] I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups
[02:15.23] All you do is annoy me, so I have been sent here to destroy you
[02:17.35] And there's a million of us just like me
[02:19.74] Who cuss like me, who just don't give a fuck like me
[02:21.87] Who dress like me; walk, talk and act like me
[02:24.53] And just might be the next best thing, but not quite me
[02:26.92] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[02:29.04] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[02:31.16] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[02:33.82] Please stand up, please stand up?
[02:35.95] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[02:37.80] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[02:39.13] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[02:42.85] Please stand up, please stand up?
[02:44.98] I'm like a head trip to listen to, ‘cause I'm only givin' you
[02:47.63] Things you joke about with your friends inside your livin' room
[02:49.76] The only difference is I got the balls to say it in front of y'all
[02:52.42] And I don't gotta be false or sugarcoat it at all
[02:54.54] I just get on the mic and spit it
[02:56.66] And whether you like to admit it, I just shit it
[02:58.79] Better than 90% of you rappers out can
[03:00.65] Then you wonder: "How can
[03:01.98] Kids eat up these albums like Valiums?"
[03:03.84] It's funny, ‘cause at the rate, I'm going, when I'm 30
[03:05.70] I'll be the only person in the nursing home flirting
[03:07.56] Pinching nurse's asses when I'm jacking off with Jergens
[03:09.95] And I'm jerking, but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working
[03:12.34] And every single person is a Slim Shady lurking
[03:14.73] He could be working at Burger King, spittin' on your onion rings
[03:17.12] Or in the parking lot, circling, screaming, "I don't give a fuck!"
[03:19.78] With his windows down and his system up
[03:22.17] So will the real Shady please stand up
[03:24.02] And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
[03:26.15] And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
[03:28.54] And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?
[03:30.93] I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[03:33.06] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[03:35.45] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[03:36.77] Please stand up, please stand up?
[03:40.23] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[03:42.35] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[03:44.48] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[03:47.67] Please stand up, please stand up?
[03:49.52] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[03:51.65] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[03:53.51] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[03:56.16] Please stand up, please stand up?
[03:58.56] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
[04:00.68] All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
[04:03.07] So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
[04:04.66] Please stand up, please stand up?
[04:07.85] Ha ha, I guess there’s a Slim Shady in all of us
[04:12.37] Fuck it, let’s all stand up!
