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The search

Howard
[03:15.28]·
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[00:02.81] I don't know, it's alright

[00:04.63] I've been dealin' with some things like every human being

[00:06.75] And really didn't sleep much last night (last night)

[00:08.63] "I'm sorry", that's fine

[00:10.75] I just think I need a little me time

[00:11.54] I just think I need a little free time

[00:12.61] Little break from the shows and the bus rides (bus rides), yeah

[00:16.92] Last year I had a breakdown

[00:18.50] Thoughts tellin' me I'm lost gettin' too loud

[00:20.64] Had to see a therapist, then I found out

[00:22.49] Somethin' funny's goin' on up in my house

[00:24.62] Yeah, I started thinkin' maybe I should move out

[00:26.47] You know, pack my cart, take a new route

[00:28.33] Clean up my yard, get the noose out

[00:30.46] Hang up my heart, let it air out (air out)

[00:32.85] I've been searchin'

[00:34.19] "What does that mean, Nate?"

[00:34.99] I've been learning

[00:36.06] Grabbin' my keepsakes, leavin' my burdens

[00:37.11] Well, I brought a few with me, I'm not perfect

[00:40.03] Lookin' at the view like, this concerns me

[00:41.89] Pickin' up the cues, right? I'm quite nervous

[00:44.03] Hate it when I lose sight, life gets blurry

[00:45.87] And things might hurt me

[00:46.94] It's prolly gonna be a long journey, but hey (but hey)

[00:49.07] It's worth it, though

[00:50.13] Cold world out there, kids, grab your coats

[00:52.00] Been a minute, I know, now I'm back to roam

[00:54.13] Lookin' for the antidote to crack the code

[00:56.00] Pretty vivid, I admit it, I'm in classic mode

[00:57.86] Don't need pity given to me, but I can't condone

[01:00.00] Talkin' down to me, I'ma have to crack your nose for crackin' jokes

[01:02.92] I'm lookin' for the map to hope, you seen it? (You seen it?)

[01:04.77] Been makin' a whole lot of changes

[01:06.63] Wrote a song about that, you should play it

[01:08.50] I get scared when I walk on these stages

[01:11.96] I look at the crowd and see so many faces, yeah

[01:12.76] That's when I start to get anxious

[01:14.88] That's when my thoughts can be dangerous

[01:16.74] That's when I put on my makeup and drown in self-hatred

[01:19.66] Forget what I'm saying, and

[01:21.79] Where'd the beat go?

[01:23.38] Oh, ain't that somethin'?

[01:24.44] Drums came in, you ain't see that comin'

[01:26.31] Hands on my head, can't tell me nothin'

[01:28.16] Got a taste of the fame, had to pump my stomach

[01:30.30] Throw it back up like I don't want it

[01:32.41] Wipe my face, clean up my vomit

[01:34.28] OCD, tryna push my buttons

[01:36.14] I said don't touch it, now y'all done it

[01:38.53] I can be critical, never typical

[01:39.86] Intricate with every syllable, I'm a criminal

[01:41.73] Intimate, but never political, pretty visual

[01:44.24] Even if you hate it, I'll make it feel like you're in it, though

[01:45.82] You call me what you wanna, but never call me forgettable

[01:47.69] Leave you deep in thought, I could never swim in the kiddie pool

[01:49.83] Way that I been thinkin' is cinematic, it's beautiful

[01:52.23] Man, I don't know if I'm makin' movies or music videos (videos, videos, videos)

[01:54.09] Yeah, the sales can rise

[01:55.95] Doesn't mean much though when your health declines

[01:58.08] See, we've all got somethin' that we trapped inside

[02:00.23] That we try to suffocate, you know, hopin' it dies

[02:02.36] Try to hold it underwater but it always survives

[02:03.95] Then it comes up out of nowhere like an evil surprise

[02:06.09] Then it hovers over you to tell you millions of lies

[02:07.95] You don't relate to that? Must not be as crazy as I am

[02:10.07] The point I'm makin' is the mind is a powerful place

[02:11.95] And what you feed it can affect you in a powerful way

[02:14.07] It's pretty cool, right? Yeah, but it's not always safe

[02:15.93] Just hang with me, this'll only take a moment, okay?

[02:17.79] Just think about it for a second, if you look at your face

[02:19.95] Every day when you get up and think you'll never be great

[02:21.81] You'll never be great, not because you're not, but the hate

[02:23.96] Will always find a way to cut you up and murder your faith (woo!)

[02:26.10] I am developin', take a look at the benefits

[02:27.98] Nothin' to meddle with, I can never be delicate

[02:30.10] Am I even relevant? That depends how you measure it

[02:31.96] Take a measurement, then bag it up and give me the evidence

[02:34.12] Pretty evident, dependable can never be tentative

[02:36.50] I'm a gentleman, depending on if I think you're genuine

[02:38.37] Pretty elegant, but not afraid to tell you to get a grip

[02:40.49] Proper etiquette, I keep it to myself when I celebrate, ah (ah)

[02:42.88] It's that time again

[02:44.23] Better grab your balloons and invite your friends

[02:46.36] Seatbelts back on, yeah, strap 'em in

[02:48.48] Look at me, everybody, I'm smilin' big

[02:50.08] On a road right now that I can't predict

[02:52.19] Tell me, "Tone that down, " but I can't resist

[02:54.05] Y'all know that sound, better raise your fist

[02:55.93] The search begins, I'm back, so enjoy the trip, huh